The French Woman is a Femme-enfant

There is the femme fatale.

There is the trophy-wife.

There is the bimbo.

There is the lolita.

And there is the femme-enfant. 

Not long ago, as I was having a conversation on women with male friends, one of them cut short and suddenly told me “you know what, very simply, our type of girls is the femme-enfant one”.

It’s funny coz we all understood what this friend meant by “femme-enfant” so I was wondering if it’s because we were all French. An English translation for “femme-enfant” would be “child-woman”. I asked German friends if there was such a word that could translate “femme-enfant” in German. Funny thing, they actually have “men-children” in Germany! But no femme-enfants. Then I asked a Belgian friend who speaks fluently French and Flemish. Interestingly, the word femme-enfant does not translate into Flemish, which led me to the conclusion that maybe, this concept is proper to the French language and maybe to the French culture.

So let me explain what a femme-enfant is, and if there actually is such a thing as femme-enfants in your language and culture, or any other types of complex gender-related stereotypes, please share!

1. A stereotype of a French woman: the “femme-enfant”

A femme-enfant is a type of women.
It’s a stereotype.

JUST MARRIED! MARRY LIKE A FRENCH

Poster from an exhibition at the City Hall of Paris in 2010; the website of the exhibition is still running, it is simple, but great, turn the volume on! More photographs of weddings taken by Gérard Uferas on his website.

Paris, city of love {sparkles, sighs and tears}… In celebration of Valentine’s day, let us explore the topic of marriage in France and try to answer this way too important question: what would their marriage have been like had Mr Big and Carrie been a French couple?

They would have been one of the 660 wedding celebrated daily in France in 2012. They’d be part of the 3/5 of French couples who chose to get married (when the other couples go for a legal commitment called the “PACS”, the French civil union, or no particular legal status at all). They most probably are 32 years old for him and 30 for her. But wait, our Mr Big was already married before… Like 21% of the men tying the knot, it would be a second wedding for him. No second wedding for Carrie, but a second passport, maybe, since 1 marriage out of 5 is “mixte” in France, as it includes a foreign born person.

“Mademoiselle, Monsieur, il faut que vous sachiez que la cérémonie du mariage est une cérémonie courte. Donc dans moins de dix min, Mademoiselle je cesserai de vous appeler Mademoiselle, Mademoiselle. Donc là j’en profite, je vais en caser beaucoup d’ici la fin du mariage parce que ce sont les derniers, Mademoiselle. Après, je vous appellerai Madame.” Paris d’Amour soundtrack

BOOK: BRINGING UP BÉBÉ, OR HOW THE FRENCH RAISE THEIR KIDS

It’s been more than a year now that Pamela Druckerman’s book about French parenting, Bringing Up Bébé, One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting was published and made people talk about it. So after having tackled on the blog several topics I like, I decided it was high time I read this book.

I’m always a little suspicious towards those best sellers as I dread that they won’t do more than exploit a few French stereotypes, and you know how funny then annoying it is to hear someone repeat/ask stuff about your country that come from where the hell.

Simply put: I liked it a lot. I was hooked after a few pages, it’s fluid, it’s fun and you learn many things about France and the mentality of the French middle class as she precises many times.

RICH OR POOR? WHAT THEIR FIRST NAMES SAY ABOUT THE FRENCH

We know that names are not given by chance: people bear names that reflect their genders, religions, their nationalities. Well then, what are typical French names, you may wonder?

1. The official list of the very French names

Spontaneously, to get an idea of what are typical French names, I would recommend you have a look at any calendar in French and check the saints. These names are traditional ones I would say.

But I also discovered an official list of the names considered French by the French authorities. This list is submitted to all people about to adopt the French nationality, and who might want to change their first names for a typical French one, “in order to facilitate the integration and daily life of the newly French“.

Now, if you are currently looking for a French name for your baby, of course, some names are in trend, others are outdated. It is sometimes funny for us French to see that some French-sounding names borne by American stars are completely outdated and only borne by French grandmas, like Michelle, Nicole, or Jacqueline. If by chance you were wondering which names are popular in France right now, check this website!

But names also are social indicators. Within a culture, some names are typical to certain social backgrounds, and reflect the tastes, mentalities, values of the parents who give them to their children. Are there names typical to the French upper class? Are there names that we only find in the French lower class?

THE FRENCH PRESIDENTS, THESE LADYKILLERS

{picture coming from a tumblr about Chirac}
{kiss montage btw Angela Merkel and Nicolas Sarkozy is from a Benetton campaign}

I remember in the US having been asked several times whether it was true that the French just take for granted that their presidents have love affairs. It is true, we just assume very naturally that they do… Politicians in general have been making such a reputation of ladykillers for themselves (or attempted ones, see below), that the contrary would actually be suspiscious.

Felix Faure dies in conditions many men would envy, Giscard tries to seduce Lady Di, Mitterrand has a secret daughter, and Chirac (the best for the dessert) tries to seduce everyone (proof with video).

THE GUYS FRENCH WOMEN LIKE

Go for adoption on adoptunmec, French dating website for women

You are a convinced masculinist? I must warn you, it’s not gonna be your cup of tea… maybe you better transfer to that article.

I wanted to share something about the hilarious concept of adopteunmec.com to our fellow interested in France’s worst and best. “Adopte un mec” (adopt a guy) is a French dating website designed for women. Yes, masculinist (what are you still doing here?!), adopt a guy, as in adopt a pet. Or adopt a highway. Or adopt a cto. Have no idea of what the hell, but these are the first suggestions Google shows when I type “adopt a”. Pfff, you can’t adopt a highway!

On adopteunmec, guys upload their profiles, girls surf and chose who they want to  get in touch with. As in the jobs applications jargon, you gotta be “pro-active”. Hum… not sure you should talk about it during you’re job interview, though. Personally I’m in favor of both genders being at least a little pro-active, but some girls are particularly pro-active and this website matches their pro-activeness I guess, while some guys like particularly pro-active girls so it’s perfect, haha!!

Anyways, on this website, girls!, they have all you need! (if you’re a dude, don’t worry, you’ll find a category). First, the whole website is very romantic. Do you see this delicious pink boudoir background? This website was simply conceptualized on the legacy of Marie Antoinette! Second, they have “special pilosity offers”, they “supply the market with geeks”, have a “selection of tattoed and pierced” specimen, and what not!  They have geeks, red haired, tattooed, pierced, hairy fellas, intellectuals, even ninjas!! So much choice! Isn’t that heaven? … no I never tried…

The sexiest dudes according to French women

They published on their blog their top 100 of the guys they would gladly adopt, after a vote gathering 57 434 women from 18 to 40. It’s hell of a sample, I know. So let’s see, who’s among the first 10 dudes?